You may already know this if you follow my Twitter feed but I’m having a break from my blog for the next few months.
I’ve written some things I’m overwhelmingly proud of this year, but I need to take a step back for a few reasons.
I’ve been battling with my mental health since I was 13, and it’s episodic in its manifestations. I’ve currently been struggling with depression, anxiety and my symptoms of both my BPD and my PTSD which I’ve been trying to manage since finally receiving my formal diagnosis of the latter two in May 2015.
I’m finding it very difficult to create content as I’m experiencing a lower libido and crushingly low self esteem. I’m finding it hard to interact with people due to incredible imposter syndrome amongst the community, and many obscene and unsolicited direct messages which have left me rather shaken. Basically, at the moment, sex blogging is becoming less fun due to the behaviour of a few individuals. It’s making me too scared to reach out and talk to people via such means, because I don’t want to invade the privacy of others. I know I post exposing and explicit content, but that is not cause for unsolicited messages, or suggestions to show up places where I indicate I might be.
However this battle is affecting my whole life, and has been triggered by recent events in my personal life. I spent most of February off work in some form, in the care of my family. I’m recovering, but need to take the steps to manage my health and remove the things that can be detrimental. This isn’t a source of income for me- it was always cathartic fun and I hope I can resume blogging in the near future.
I’ll still be using Twitter, although my messages will remain closed.
Those who I speak to regularly, please don’t treat me any differently. The time I spent with some of you at Eroticon earlier this year was so very happy. And you are all the reason I’m not abandoning this completely. I like having friends in this community.